pour the waves (by Rebecca Chasteen) Monday, Oct 12 2009

Some days,
the music just has to be loud
loud enough
to drive out all temptation to believe in lies
to drive out the numb that doesn’t try

The music just has to be moving enough
to keep me moving
has to remind me of
everything that matters
everything that moves
there is never
nothing
I can do

I can do
something with this
even if it’s
just feel it
even if it’s
just be here

be here
and don’t leave
don’t obliterate myself
on rocky shores
don’t release my grasp
don’t follow their lead
this is what there is to believe-
this is all there is
and this is all that matters

some days
the music just has to be loud
loud enough
to remind me

I just have to be needy enough
to pull it in
anxious
angry
enough
to demand more

pour the waves
pour the waves
pour the waves

my skin is bare
my throat is dry
my stomach waits
my heart aches

pour the waves
pour the waves
pour the waves

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F. Scott Fitzgerald (by Rebecca Chasteen) Wednesday, Feb 25 2009

There are times I wish life
was always F. Scott Fitzgerald
pumpkin loaf
and mocha
with lipstick prints
on the white lid
and time
to take
and breathe
and write
and hear
the way music
does the things
that music does

there’s a hundred
little scenes
I’d be happy
with living over and over

but no one appreciates
what they can always have
and I’d hate to lose
the way it feels
to be here right now

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Debris (by Rebecca Chasteen) Sunday, Jan 4 2009

I keep thinking
someone else’s words
lyrics
songs
will
work out the kinks
in the words I can’t say,
the sickness that washes me away

now I see the waste
and I can’t get past this place

I’m covered with debris
it’s dirty air I breathe
I don’t know how to be

I feel high for a minute
epiphanies turn to epitaphs
I ache
anger
disgust
I can’t shake

cry to convulsions
mind still bent
begging someone
never speaking

fear digs in its heels
regret goes in for the kill

I’m covered in debris
It’s dirty air I breathe
I know what’s expected of me
I just can’t get free.

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What I heard when you moved me (by Rebecca Chasteen) Saturday, Jan 3 2009

separate yourself

give more
give more

keep a safe distance
because there are no safe places

let your heart
break
in that quiet place
in that solitude

work hard
to maintain
that feeling – okay

let the
heaviest
thoughts
lay
still

make room
make room

let the easy words
through
let the easy things do

be cautious
and don’t care

balance it

let go
let go

and hold on

nothing,
nothing’s
wrong

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